Love is watching someone die

That song came on last night and it brought me to tears. The thought of my grandmother holding my granddad’s hand as he died is heart wrenching. Yet, at the same time, there is something beautiful in the idea of her watching her husband of fifty-seven years take his last breath. I don’t think lucky is the right word, but maybe it is. My granddad used to tell us about the first time he met my grandmother; he went straight home and told his parents he had met the woman he was going to marry. My grandmother was, as she puts it, “less sure”. I’m not sure what he did to convince her, or if she even needed much convincing, but fifty-seven years later, I think about the time they have shared together, the things they have accomplished together, the life they have experienced together, and the love they had for each other up until the very end and, well, I think I would wish that kind of luck on to everyone I know.

There was a brief moment during John and Lauren’s wedding reception in which Jeremy and I thought one of us might need to make a speech. While it never panned out – which is most likely for the best as I had no idea what to say at the time – it made me think later on about what I would have said given that opportunity. It’s important for me to let all of you know (you who read this and care about where I am and what I am doing even though we don’t talk every day) that I consider you my family. I’ve grown up with you, I’ve laughed with you, I’ve cried with you, I’ve argued with you, I’ve learned from you and I’ve probably broken several laws with you. I am so proud of the things we have all managed to accomplish and I sometimes can’t believe we haven’t completely fucked it up. This whole ‘life’ thing can be a little complicated and I am infinitely grateful to have had you all to help me through it. I don't mean to be overly sentimental, it's just that, in light of recent events, I wanted to take a moment to let you all know how honored I am to be your friend. That’s all. Love!

So who’s gonna watch you die?